Wow, Day 19! Now, the person I was before I started this — the person I had become after I lost my job, and the person who actively did but always fell out of doing, that person… likely would have given up by now.
But I haven’t, and this time it feels like I am doing everything right. No, I am doing everything right. I have started to change the person I am — literally just by saying I am someone who does things and follows through. I am someone who does yoga. I am someone who does cardio 5 days a week. I am someone who plans, sets goals, and accomplishes them. I am someone who films and preps videos two months in advance. I am someone who keeps a small journal — just in case. I am someone who actively supports my partner and helps him with his part of the chores, instead of just doing mine.
I am someone who makes lists and gets a small little piece of satisfaction when I cross things off. I am someone who is happy, even through stress and adversity because I know it will just make me stronger.
I am someone who drinks more water and sugar-free, herbal teas than coffee and juice. I am someone who has great hygiene (I’ve actually always had this — I am very clean, but not an over-groomer.)
I am someone who spends three paragraphs tell you who and what I am because those statements are my facts. 19 days ago I set out on a journey to save my own life in 30 days. I have 11 days to go, and I can already see my life changing. There has been adversity along the way, and there always will be. But my willpower is strong, and it will endure.
I feel fantastic right now, we’re about to go to bed at midnight for the first time since I went on school break. I get my final grades for my first term on Sunday and I am almost 100% certain that I did well.
We almost have our family issues situated and I could not be happier. We will be doing a big move here in the coming months, and we are planning to be out of here ASAP. The new ownership doesn’t jive with us, and quite frankly it is time for a safer neighborhood.
So let’s get into it!
Eating & Exercise
I did 19 minutes of yoga, and 4 minutes of walking, and I did 25 minutes of heavy housework. Tell me that last part isn’t exercise! Am I right?
We had Boba tea today, and btw Taro Milk Tea tastes like birthday cake. It’s crazy. We had a small box cake to celebrate my roommate’s new job and my publication and feature to Huffington Post tonight and the family watched some Mystery Science Theater 3000.
I had pizza (leftovers), coffee, and my roommate made chicken stew so I had that for dinner.
The last thing probably wasn’t the healthiest for me, but we need to get groceries and all of our funds are being focused toward NEEDS for bills right now.
My Pain Level
You remember my sprained ankle? Lord help me it still hurts, don’t know what I did to the poor thing. Been wrapping it and rubbing pain cream on it, seems to help.
As for back pain I am feeling so much better — I have been more mobile in the last week than I have been in years, and I gotta tell you — it’s awesome.
My back pain and limitations are still there for the most part, it’s not miracle work, but as I lose the weight and gain the muscle I am certain I will survive this and come out on top.
Emotional and Mental Health
I made a joke on Facebook today that I was becoming an adult. I’m 27-years-old and I have finally taken the leaps into my life to become a real adult. I have always thought being an adult meant doing what your parents did. You know what I mean? Get a good paying job, get married, and pay out your debt until you die.
I am starting to realize it’s not like that. Being an adult is about being proactive and being hungry for success. It doesn’t matter what your brand of success is, if you do what you love and find a way for people to pay for it — that’s a type of success. As I get healthier, and my mental health stays strong I will be able to push my freelancing gig into full-game eventually. I will be able to get my life where it needs to be.
All of this starts with finding a way for ME to fight my mental health disorders. Keep in mind I do take medication that regulates my hormones but it only does so much for my mental health. I made a choice for me that I would no longer take anti-phys or anti-depression medication. There was never a drug they used with me that had the right level. It never worked.
Please keep in mind this is MY EXPERIENCE and not someone else’s and I cannot speak for the entire community of people suffering with mental health disorders.
Life is changing, it’s crazy who I was is still a part of me, but they don’t have to control my completeness. I hope to inspire others to take the same path I have and it doesn’t have to be yoga, it could be any habit that you build to get you moving and into a positive change.
Life is endlessly crazy, and you never know what is going to happen that will or could destroy you. But I do know one thing — in my current disaster I have had so many people reach out and help, and there is so much love from my friends that I am blown away.
To those of you have had done all they can to help and then some, to those of you reading this — thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart and my family’s. Trust me we will not forget this when we are not longer at the bottom.
So, moving forward, I need to wrap this up cause my partner is ready for bed and its 12:07Am!!! OH NO! We didn’t get to bed before midnight, oops!
But I still have time to be in bed before 1am! Haha!
Anyway, I am starting a life-planner tomorrow and what I will do when it’s finished is film a video and post it on my YouTube Channel: Fantasy & Coffee. This way you who are interested can see the process and get an idea what someone who is juggling a life of crazy does to keep their life from falling apart!
I will leave you with a quote again this evening, this one is from a life experience.
“If you are feeling trapped or stressed, you know what you do? Leave, leave your stress. Move away from it. Move to another town, city, state, even another country. Get away from your stress.” — Dr. Mossaade (My biology professor, PhD of neuroscience, MD cardiologist)
YouTube Channel: Fantasy & Coffee